I WROTE THIS FOR MY LOVELY SISTER..

17/AUGUST/2009

SUNDAY EVENING-5.39PM..

i'm sitting in front of my younger sister ika mirror..

in my great parent house..

i'm live in blank..

no one else around me..

im fell lonely..

im switch off my handphone

so im not disturbing from anyone..

im listen a radio with earphone..

such an great acustic music version..

am i enjoy???

with my new life???

i really dont now..

i live in blank..

beside me is window

i look around,downit's lovely outside

not so warm,not too cold..

like my fav panorama always..

wanted to see..

look at bird flew around to d big tree..

everything goes fine but..

im felling lonely..so lonely..

is this the thing i that

i wanted to do and achieve???..

am i do the right thing??..

i dont now..

i miss my friend..exspecially my best buddy

pito and aman..

some people said that

im change??..

but for me im not..

is these the felling

that my sister fell when she saw

that im totally change

it's really hard to say..

really hard to say

sometimes im also

cant reconize that was me..

i dont want to be like

i do now..

if my lovely sister

notice that im change..

why im not..

it's strange

soo strange..

im WORRIED..

oh my god[ALLAH]

i lay down my head front the mirror

i close my eyes..

switch off music..

suddenly im crying..

im crying..

for the first time after a few month..

of transformation..

i close my eyes again

and i heard my old voice..

i see me play around with my

lovely sister ika..

we are laughing and scolding each other

we are soo happy..

yes we are..

when i open my eyes..

everything dissappear..

now im realize

that i was change..

to the new person!!!!

i hope im not change a lot..and not for everybody..

everybody see me for

the first time after im change they was crying??

i dont now why..

is it happy or saddnes??..

i dont now!!!

i realy dont know..

some of my best friend

were crying

they said

i'ts hard to find the true friend..

my sister told me once..

she like when im change but???

she doest now who infront her!!!

and someone who always fun and kepoh now lost!!!

now i got what they trying to say..

even my life as a new person..

some people who dont like me before..now change to like me..

and everything change..

the change that

i dont want it to be..

yup somepeople will said"people change"

but i dont like it..

coz only you now who you are really..

i want my family

who always laugh..

cry..listen my story..

go everywhere together..

sharing everything..

with me back..

also my best friend..

i want it back..

i want it back..

i want it back..

back

back

please back..

i wnat the old me..

i want my family..

i want my best friend..

please god(ALLAH)..

IM HAPPY OUTSIDE BUT INSIDE????.

im happy when peaople happy

now there are sad..

so im the one great the saddness

and i deserve to be sad more

then anyone else....

miss myself soo much...

[from HAFIEZ]..